A Date with my Arch Nemesis

Oh god, having your picture taken in a photo booth is a traumatic event...

There was a man outside waiting (he was a bit creepy.. very strange leery smile..) so after the 8th count of the woman saying loudly "if you would like to re-take your picture press the green button" I got incredibly paranoid that man would think that I was either crazy, obsessive or just plain vain and just pressed ok..

I'm not even going to show the faceless people of my blogging world the horrific site that beheld me as that slip of shiny paper dropped from the machine.

I swear I've seen that image on crimewatch.

I have a theory that those machines are statically charged so that your hair goes crazy as soon as you sit down. That added to the fact that it appears to defeat even the strongest concealer gave me a haggard, tired and "mad cat lady" look.

Which I suppose I am..


Oooh also! I am being plagued by pond liners! After my sighting about a week ago, where I had to swerve to avoid one in the middle of the road, I spotted yet another today perched on top of a hedge on the road towards Sutton.. Very strange..

Brown? Really? Hmm

I suppose it is fate.. I should have waited for advice..

After last post I got all over excited and went and bought some brown hair dye 
(about 5 minutes after asking for advice... Ahem)

Did as the instructions said, I even wore the gloves that looked suspiciously like condoms..

After 15 minutes I rinsed off the dye to reveal that it had not done anything! 

Infact my hair now looks even more bland than before!

Dammit..

Will have to go to hairdressers after all... 

Please Give Input!

Hmm

I am at that point once more when I am bored with my hair. The stupid hairdresser woman did a crazy hair style which I hate and am now in the process of "growing out" - yes BG, in the same manner we had to before...

So as I can't have any more hair taken off without fully transforming into my alter ego German Boy once more, the only thing left to do is colour.

Now, my hair has gone into what I like to call it's Winter Coat, where it loses all shine and goes from blonde to a dull blondy-brown.

Do I dye it brown? I would like to.. I think... although I always struggle to pick the right colour (obviously am v. pale and would like to not look Dead) Or do I go blonder? Hmm...

Any input?

I suppose it could happen to anyone.. or at least anyone with a tiny cat

On the odd occasion I like to get some housework done.

With a blind cat alot of stuff gets knocked over/spilt/soiled..

Whilst tidying a pile of post on the floor I suddenly realised that at some point the cat had actually managed to climb up onto my neck without me noticing and was now fast asleep on my back.

Gah. Cannot stand up!

I waddled over to the cat hammock and tried tipping the cat off my back but, alas, the cat could not be moved. (lets just say there were claws involved)

Realisation that if this incident happened when I was alone in the house I would in fact be stuck. There is no easy way to remove a cat from your upper back without the aid of another person.

The perils of public transport...

When you have a break from public transport it always seems that much worse to go back to 
it..

I arrived at the train station puffing and panting (illness has left me exhausted at the slightest 
movement) to discover that 2 of the earlier trains had been cancelled and platform 4 was 
heaving with angry commuters and irritated shoppers.

When the train arrived it was so full that by the time I had waded through the croud and 
reached the train even my slight frame could not wedge into the compartment.

Around 20 minutes later another train arrived and I boarded first (having fought my way there)
. Once on the train I did the polite thing and stepped right to the back to allow more people 
on board.

It was there, against the unused doors of the opposite side of the carriage that I got myself 
wedged.

Yes, wedged.

A stupid woman with an oversized pushchair rammed her way into the train, running over my 
feet with the childs footrest.

She then proceeded to lock the wheels on her pram of terror and walk off up the train with 
the child in tow.

Meanwhile I was wedged against the doors with my feet stuck under the pram for the whole 
duration of the trip.

When finally the glorious sight of Birmingham arrived, the woman had the cheek to tut at me for leaning on the damn thing! 

No-one can beat their Grandma's cooking..

I love going up to Grandma's.. there is always lots of pie..

We spent the day tuning in a digibox and then unplugging it again when Grandma didn't want it.

We also ate alot of food. ALOT of food.

Oh I ate alot of pie, but it was totally worth it! Also came home with spare pie and a book which is 
the unofficial sequel to Pride and Prejudice. Good day all round! Now I just have to get some actual
work done..  

On my day off it seems I enjoy working in other uni's

I spent yet another day off at Staffs Uni.. I must be the only person in the world who actually goes to a different uni when they aren't at their own.

At least I got some work done! Well, I say some, it is impossible to get much done sat next to 
James. 

I think he sees it as some sort of a challenge to get my attention away from my work!
Also, have noticed today that James's emphatic gestures are getting more, well, emphatic. Whilst describing something in his personal project he actually managed to hit me on the shoulder.. He's also started doing what I have labelled his "management clap" which involves clasping his hands together in a very slow clap. It fills me with dread. After the clap I know that there is a long winded explanation of something technical coming... it also feels like I am getting the explanation reserved for dumb people (which I suppose makes sense when the subject is financial programming...)

Random journey home involved swerving to avoind a large plastic pond in the middle of the road...

Weird eh?

When it comes to the Dentist, I am transformed into an idiot..

Me: Hello. I have an appointment at ten to

Dental Nurse: Do you pay for your treatment?

Me: I haven't been in yet?

Dental Nurse: Please take a seat upstairs

At which point I take a seat downstairs and a Nurse has to come searching for me to tell me I am meant to be upstairs.

My Dentist appears to be wearing what can only be described as pyjamas and seems to be Polish. Haven't a clue what he is saying. After a few awkward minutes the assistant looks at me and says sympathetically "please take a seat"

I think they have decided that I am afraid of dentists?!? Oh well, never mind.

Dentist: Have you come for a check up?

Me: Erm, ok. My wisdom teeth are coming and it hurts. (why the hell did I say that?)

My god those gloves were making me gag. I was feeling nauseus (is that spelt right?) from my illness and my head was spinning. I had already had to walk to the dentist as James was using the car.

He poked my gum at the back and told me to take antibiotics and come back in a week.

I stayed sat down.

He handed me a prescription and looked at me in a meaningful way.

Obviously that is what counts as a check up nowadays.. am feeling dissallusioned, don't dentists usually count out numbers? Well, that 30 seconds cost me £15..

The woman on reception told me I had to come back in a week, and so booked me an appointment for the 8th November.

A week? really? Obviously woman is mad, so I nod politely and put in my pin number (incidently I can't use one of those pin machines without smirking now - see post about Holiday day trip to Warwick Castle) and I walk home in the rain...

Those of a nervous disposition - do not read!

This evening I was happily lying on the sofa watching James do his work when something tickled the lower part of my back.

A verrry large house spider was inside my jeans.

I jumped up and shook it out and James jumped around shouting "arrrr it's huge!"

Strangely enough I am fine about the whole ordeal.. James on the other hand keeps shuddering and flailing

Does anyone have a cure for flu? I don't have the time for this!

oh god I am so ill

My head feels like it is splitting in half.. May have some kind of flu or virus. Had to ring in to uni 
and explain that I was ill and wasn't coming in. Very paranoid that they don't believe me 
(even though they joke that I never go home) and I think I wont be in tomorrow..

On a lighter note, when I came downstairs (at 6pm - that's how ill I am!) I noticed that there was 
a distinct nibble mark on one of the blades of grass :) Subliminal messaging with your cat really 
works!

Well, I am going to go and curl up again now, eyes are hurting from brightness of screen... 

Work achieved today? .. minimal

Ahh the joys of procrastination..

I have a meeting with my tutor and course leader tomorrow regarding my canal project. 

I have spent from 12 o'clock trying to start some work and ended up encountering the following issues that needed my attention immediately..

1. Terrible, evil headache brought on by wisdom teeth gouging hole in gums
   
2. Toy shopping with James for various Nieces and Nephews
3. Tummy ache
4. Time Team on More4 (oh god I know!)
5. Helping Audrey place some items on ebay
6. Trying to give subliminal grass eating messages to the cat
7. Teaching Audrey how to edit her holiday photos
8. Watching James play theme hospital
9. Folding up our beast of a tent (this was a mean feat! Tent was 6m x 6m and had to fit into a small rectangular bag)

I know for a fact that dinner will be ready soon, my headache is making a reappearance and I will want to go for a bath soon...

Am I ever to get any work done?

 

What's the opposite of alfresco?

As you may have gathered, I have a teeny tiny cat that I aquired last spring.

She was malnourished, blind, had no hair, no teeth and her nails regularly fell off. After lots of food and attention and a few trips to James's Sister (she is a vetinary nurse) my little cat is looking really healthy.

Unfortunately, due to the blindness, my Kitty can't go outside. I feel quite sorry for her (although she does go out on her lead in good weather) and thought it would be good to grow some of that Cat Grass stuff.

According to the packet the cat would eat the grass and this would aid her digestion and help prevent fur balls. Great!

After 4 days of growth on the window ledge my cat grass is flourishing. Unfortunately all attempts to get the cat to eat the grass have failed. As you can see in the picture she is having none of it..

I am just left with a tray of grass on my desk...

The wonderful world of Barbie

Children are so strange...

Today I asked my Sister what my Niece would like for Christmas (very early i know, but i have to spread the cost out!)

Apparently she wants the Barbie that scoops up dog poo.

?!?!?

After investigation I have discovered that this is a real toy. She has a dog called "Tanner" who is fuzzy and you feed him dog biscuits. Consequently the dog then "does it's business" and Barbie has to scoop this up. Children are definitely odd.

I must admit however, that I can remember wanting some strange presents.. I remember when I was 4 all I wanted in the whole world was an ironing board. My cousin at around that same age wanted "rope."

Feel free to reminisce!

Clarity at last..

Earlier today I was driving through Lichfield on my way to pick up James when an old couple almost drove into the side of me on a roundabout.

Was very traumatic - involved an emergency stop and I forgot where the horn was (incidently it was on my steering wheel)

It was just after this, whilst my heart beat quickly, that I had an apiphany...



The Simspons car is pink?!?

A chat to my blog (I'm so bored and lonely!)

Basically I am sat at home all alone. Now I am a people person at heart and although I do like some alone time I do tend to get a bit, well, lonely. So I have decided that I will sit here and witter on for a while in the hope that I will divert some of my boredom and be able to get on with some uni work.


Yesterday was a good day..

I got further with my work at uni (something that seemed impossible on Monday), I got to see James at lunch in Starbucks (which was yummy on both levels) and I had a good laugh.

James spent the afternoon roaming around Birmingham waiting to pick me up at 5. When asked what he had done all afternoon he simply replied "I gave a pound to a tramp on a bridge."

Today, however, I have become all sleepy and lazy. James left for uni at half 7 leaving me to crawl back into bed and fester. Now I know that when James gets home he will want to go and play tennis. If there is one thing in the world I do not feel like doing today it is play tennis..

In an attempt to get motivated I have turned on my laptop and sat scrunched up on the sofa. In a minute I intend on getting a mug of milky coffee (yes - I do understand that this may make me more sleepy but it is so comforting!) and try to get my design into a CAD plan. At least I will have achieved something today!

Ooh must also take a trip to the bank - I had a phone call on Monday from a strange Birmingham number.

"hello, am I speaking to Kate?"
"Yes, hello...?"
"Hi, I'm from the BIAD faculty office, we have had a cheque arrive for you from your LEA"
"Ooh! OK! I'll come and get it!"

45 seconds, 3 flights of stairs, a trip through the canteen and a trek down a bizarre glass corridoor and I was at the office.

The man seemed shocked that I was there so quick.. I informed him that he would also be that quick if someone was giving him a cheque he didn't have to pay back.

In that respect I have got to say that I am eternally grateful to Wales. They give me money for free, almost like some sort of parental figure of a country... I must say though, I am starting to get quite freaked out about uni coming to an end. In 8 months time I will be in a state of panic.

At Christmas I intend writing to companies explaining my position and requesting interviews. Hopefully I can find somewhere willing to take me on from July. This part of the plan is the part most fragile and prone to failure.

It is a given thing that I have always been unemployable. When I get a job I am a model employee, I am always on time, I get my work complete and I do this to a high standard. Unfortunately I tend to turn into a wreck at interview. I laugh too much, I fidget and I get really aware that this is making me seem like some sort of shoplifter with a guilty conscience.

Anyway, this is turning into a mammouth blog! I am sorry! If you have read all the way to here then well done! You have a greater attention span than I!

Furry creature alert

On leaving the uni building my friend screamed out making us all jump back in alarm.

A squirrel had just leapt out of the bin at us..

A rant about a bygone era..

On the walk home from the station I nearly broke my neck stepping on what turned out to be a conker. This saddened me on many levels - I nearly fell over in front of many people - most of which were pre-pubescent and would have felt immense pleasure pointing and laughing.

The saddest part however, was that the conker was there at all. When I was little, finding a conker was one of those magical moments, seeing it there on the floor with its marvelous chestnut brown armour gleaming through the grass. We used to go for miles around searching for a conker, soaking them in vinegar and hiding them in the airing cupboard - anything to make them invincible.

Is it just that we live in a society so obsessed with risk assessment that the children no longer continue this age old tradition, or is it just evolution? Are the simple pleasures of discovering your first conker, hidden beneath a lime green pin cushion of a shell, just a distant tradition overtaken by technology? Why bother going to all that trouble when we can play virtual conkers on our PSP eh?

Well I have taken it on as my mission to pick up all of the conkers I see lying unwanted and abandoned, even if they aren't treasured by society any more - I will not leave them to rot on the pavement.

What a sad end to childhood.

Oh James.. you come out with some classic speako's...

Me: "It's steaming up in here"

James: "don't worry, I've put the air onto circumcise.."

The tennis bag with many uses...

It struck me the other day that James's tennis bag really reminded me of something...

A day of extreme weather and destruction to property..

This morning, as James and I lay snuggled in bed (incidently the alarm had gone off three times already..) there was a crash - bang noise from the direction of Hugo's cage.

From the bed we have quite a good view of our small furry friend, who had managed to destroy the roof of his house and was seen to be looking out of the wreckage with a look of confusion on his face.

The poor baby had also managed to trap himself on the top floor of his four storey mansion by covering his escape tube with the discarded roof...

Needless to say we started a campaign to rebuild the house which resulted in James dismantling the cage and me having to fix it again..



Also - journey to uni was amazing today! As James is now a basket weaver again (term used loosly) I have access to the car every other week again! Travelling through the glorious sights of Birmingham and passing under the M6 it began raining like fury. Lights on, wipers full I continued until I hit a snaking queue of trafficby Star City. I was sat on the dual carraigeway with lightning striking the gas towers in front of me and the train track to the left.

I must admit I adore the violence and beauty.

(however, I was bricking it slightly as was sat in large metal car)